I was on Facebook the other day & I saw a story from a man who had just proposed to his girlfriend with a ring he bought after saving up for months. They had been together for years & were in their early 20's while finishing both of their degrees. They didn't have much money, but he knew he loved her & wanted to be with her forever. So, he planned an amazing dinner & walk on the beach before dropping to a knee & pouring out his heart to the girl he loved. & she said no. She said no, because she didn't think the ring he got her was good enough. Needless to say, he broke up with her after & moved on with life. Now, I am sure you could argue that maybe he could have waited until they were more financially stable. I think this actually showed her true character, but this story really got me thinking.
What is the actual point of a wedding ring? I did some research (I love learning new things) & the wedding band dates back to 6,000 years ago in Ancient Egypt where braided hemp & reeds that were exchanged between wedded couples as a public display of their commitment to the other. The modern version of the wedding ring that were made of precious metals originated in Ancient Rome & Greece. The diamond engagement ring, however, did not come about until 1938 during The Great Depression when diamond prices dropped drastically. Then, in 1947 the slogan "diamonds are forever" came about. Thus, the insanity on the perfect diamond engagement ring was born.
Now that you have had your history lesson for the day, we can ask the real question: Does the wedding ring actually matter?
Don't get me wrong, I love my wedding ring & I am so grateful to Jake for making sure I had exactly what I wanted my ring to be like. So, this is not a post about not wanting a ring or bashing on girls that have huge rocks. Since Jake & I started dating we knew we were going to be married pretty young. We didn't know the exact year or time, but we knew we had found our missing half in each other & we wanted to grow up as one. When we talked about getting married, Jake's first concern wasn't the guest list or the place of ceremony. It was my ring. He was scared that he wouldn't be able to afford a ring that would make me happy. A few months before he proposed, he bought a ring for me. It was cubic zirconium & sterling silver, & I loved it. It wasn't my "dream ring," but it was from Jake & that was all I really cared about.
The part of getting engaged that (surprisingly) was the worst, was people asking to see my ring. I would rather someone ask to see an engagement picture than look at my ring. While Jake was in boot camp, he made it very, very clear that when he got home, he was getting me a new ring. We were getting married 2 days after we came back from his graduation, so I had to get my ring while Jake was still gone. I felt so, so guilty going & picking a ring out on my own that I sent him a picture in a letter right when I got home with it. Jake, being the amazing man he is, said he didn't care what I chose as long as I was happy with it. I picked a beautiful solitaire ring and a diamond band. I fell in love with it the second it was on my hand.
I love my wedding ring. Every time I look at it, I fall more in love with the man I never thought I could love more. But, this is right where I think the problem comes in. Not everyone looks at a wedding ring as a public visualization of your individual love, they look at it as the bigger the diamond, the more love. Some of the most elegant, beautiful, extravagant rings have no love behind them, & the smallest, or no diamond at all rings have more love than able to profess. My grandma has 2 wedding rings. Her diamond one is absolutely stunning. My grandpa picked it out for her & it has a lot of sentimental value. She also has a gold band. Just a band, no diamond. & she wears it every single day. I asked her why she doesn't wear her diamond one & she said "I just don't see the point in it unless I'm trying to impress someone with my flashy ring." Now, my grandma wasn't trash talking her ring or my grandpa, she just doesn't see the point in the diamond ring. They have been married 57 years & that little gold band she wears on her left ring finger represents 3 children, 2 people in love, & 1 family that I was born into and all started with purely love.
Always remember, without love, there is no point in a ring. So, Relationship first. Rings second.
-KS
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